Would anyone like to suggest a title for a thread?
If you have a topic to post, please send it to me via E-mail, and I will put iy on the blog for you. This blog is for all of us, so please let us hear from you!
tford60@earthlink.net
Tom Ford
NO. 288
tford60@earthlink.net
Tom Ford
NO. 288
posted by Crestwood Independent at 09:26
4 Comments:
Idle thoughts
1- I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2- Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
3- Borrow money from pessimists - they don’t expect it back.
4- Half the people you know are below average.
5- 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6- 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
7- A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
8- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
9- If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
10- All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
11- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
12- I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.
13- OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
14- How do you tell when you’re out of invisible ink?
15- If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
16- Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
17- When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
18- Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
19- I intend to live forever; so far, so good.
20- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21- Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
22- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23- My mechanic told me, “I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.”
24- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
25- If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27- Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
28- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is, research.
30- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.
32- The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33- Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don’t have film.
34 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your Headlights work?
35 - Sharing is the first step to Communism
36 - If at first you don’t succeed, get a bigger hammer.
37 - Two wrongs don’t make a right. Three rights, however, make a left.
Just a bit of humor!
Tom Ford
From proposed animal control code:
"Sec, 6-15 Cooperation with Animal Control Officer - Right of Entry.
...The Animal Control Officer or those acting in his behalf shall have the right of entry onto any lots or lands for the purpose of collecting any dog, cat, or other animal, which is subject to impoundment pursuant to this Chapter. The Animal Control Officer or those acting on his behalf shall have the right of entry to any property or premises within any quarantined area during the period of such quarantine for the purpose of examining or obtaining any dog, cat, or other animal suspected of having rabies, having been exposed to rabies, or having bitten a person or other animal."
Please attend the town hall meeting this Thursday evening, at Whitecliff 7:00-9:00PM.
Tom, how about a thread that gets people to brainstorm the top ten things Crestwood needs to do to be a successful City?
Maybe:
If you were running Crestwood what would you do to make life better for our community?
(And throw out all the crap that directly attacks other people.)
9:58 - Excellent idea! I will work on a list and I hope others will do the same. I think we will see some great ideas spring forth.
Post a Comment
<< Home